Recently in On The Rag Category

I know, no need to comment on such a lame bag but I just have one thing to say. If I wanted a tote that looks like the one in the picture, why wouldn't I just get a tote that was that shape rather than getting a rectangular tote that has a trompe l'oeil of the bag I really want? Does that make sense? And it's not like the trompe l'oeil bag is some magnificent design that couldn't be achieved in real life, it is just a plain stupid tote with some straps. If it were like in the shape of a humming bird or something else too frail to accomplish in real life, then fine. You know the reason behind trompe l'oeil, such as, you want to have a huge scene of a long ass hallway but your house is only 2,000 square feet so you have to just live with a fake hallway drawn in. Anyway, if you think it is novel it does make a good bag for the grocery store and is only $98 at Saks.

Kelly and I are having a huge debate right now. Despite an affinity for Prada, she hates a Prada bag that I had found strangely appealing last month. My argument is that Miuccia Prada's strangeness is due to her incredibly intelligent creativity, not out of a need for attention or marketing. Not that I would carry the crazy stuff she puts out but at least I understand where it comes from. Until I saw this thing. This Pizzo S satchel is beyond my comprehension. It's like a hippo dressed in black lace. Or a widow dressed for a funeral. Anything, but a bag that a normal sane person would carry. Prada bag $1,995 at Saks.com

Who buys Gucci bags these days? Every time I walk past its boutique I laugh at the hideous bags in the windows. Sometimes, for further entertainment, I will actually walk in and watch the fashion victims who buy the bags merely for the Gucci logo and not for any real style or taste because anyone with eyes can see these bags are lacking in both departments. I guess you could argue that Gucci bags are at least predictable, you will get either the boring GG logos or bags that are just ridiculous. Like the carpet bagger inspired Hysteria Tapestry Totes above ($1,295). Gone with the Wind was one of my all time favorite movies as a kid (I had a lot of older cousins) and one of my favorite words uttered out of Scarlett O'Hara's mouth was when she told off the carpetbagging nouveau riche couple and called them "Scallowags". Which is such a perfect description of these bags! At Gucci.com, while you're there, click around and check out the entire Hysteria line with the awful Gucci crest. It's good for a Friday afternoon chuckle.

Lily Satchel $1400 at Neiman Marcus; Frame Doctor Bag from 2007

Dear Bag Snob,

I love your website and use the info from it on a regular basis. My question is in regards to Dolce & Gabbana bags. I don’t see anything listed on the site about them. A sales gal at Saks told me (she thought, anyhow) that they were a step up from Prada and Gucci. What do you all think of them? I am anxious to hear your response!

Thanks,
Lisa E.

This is officially rag on Chloe week. Please help me out here because I am not sure what you're supposed to do with the Joan Python from Chloe, carry it or wear it? At first I thought it was a tube top or dress but then quickly and unfortunately realized it is a bag. I actually have a very clever idea (I know, I am full of clever ideas). Slash the bottom of the bag and wear it as a sexy tube top a la Carrie Bradshaw and rock it with skinny jeans and a pair of stiletto heels! I am serious, let's dissect this thing apart-- the useless belt across the middle? Perfect to cinch under your chest for that babydoll look (of course it would be best if you are flat chested but a little cleavage never hurt anybody so even if you are ample it will work). The long handle will also make a great halter strap!. Do you know how expensive python clothes are? $2940 is an outrageous price for such an ugly bag but as a sexy python top? It's a steal. See, I can find practical use for the most ridiculous of things. Chloe Joan python bag

I don't know how Chloe is staying in business with bags like this. I was never a fan of the Heloise but this small version with the ridiculously long handles of ropey knots takes ugly to a whole new level. Seriously, those knots look like turds. And the entire thing is way out of proportion. It is also drawstring, another pet peeve of mine when it comes to bags, it is just not something that makes sense and it is extremely unattractive. It also has those big ass tabs like the Bay bag, again, not something I was in love with. It's like they just put all the grossest details of their bag collection on one bag. The only thing remotely acceptable is the teal blue color, which I am thinking I need for Fall. But trust me, it will not be a Chloe because at this rate, I doubt they will have anything I would spend money on. But then again, I am known to be wrong =) But PLEASE, make me wrong and shock the hell out of me!!! $1600 at Browns Fashion.

I feel as if I have nothing nice to say lately. I am going through look books and emails from PR firms like mad, trying to find a snob worthy bag to report to you but am coming up short. I saw this today and was immediately annoyed at being assaulted by yet another hideous bag but then I laughed; I mean it's a silly clown of a bag with multi-patches and colors-- one that is meant to be laughed at! After chuckling over the ridiculousness from Celine called "Watch Me Dance"-- I thought, who would want a giant rubik's cube for a bag? Then I noticed that it is sold out. As in every bag they had, bought. It's a fairly new bag so it's not as if it was sold during the sale extravaganza at 75% off. Whoever bought them all, paid full price. I hope they're having fun with it. If you purchased it, let me know why you like it. Just curious. Was at Net-a-porter.com for $1,200 but is now sold out. Go figure.

Does the Dior stamped croc tote for Fall look eerily familiar to you? I don't think it takes a genius to see where its inspiration is drawn from. Not only is the shape uncanny to the YSL tribute tote (which came out last year), they even went as far as using a stamped croc leather, as if no one would notice?!?! So the handle is slightly different and they added an outer pocket but everything else (including the dangling logo) is too similar to ignore! I was discussing bags with a friend who is a director at a large fashion house in New York last year and she had said-- "Everyone in the bag business wants to be YSL." Apparently, Dior does, too. Of course, it could be er.... coincidence. As in, pigs fly south each winter. Dior $1,895 at eLuxury and YSL Tribute tote $1,395 at Saks.com

I bought this clutch on sale yesterday and you really cannot fully understand my disappointment. I have to go way back, like 18 years back, to fully explain where I'm coming from. Prada is the reason I am so obsessed with bags, while in college I vowed, just like Scarlett O'Hara, that I would lie, cheat and steal in order to have every Prada bag I ever wanted. It was actually the motivation behind my goal of wanting to make lots and lots of money. OK, so I was shallow but I do not need to apologize, I was 20.
Anyway, Prada is the reason there is even Bag Snob (Tina shared this obsession with me). My closet was like a mini Prada store and it was the proudest accomplishment of my stupid little life. So fast forward to the last few years of pathetic Prada bag designs... there was not a single bag I even wanted much less commit legal and moral crimes to have it. But then things made a turn and there was this amazing ombre clutch, the front flap goes from dark grey to taupe in the back. The leather is so soft and yummy with clean lines that they're known for. I didn't even mind

One can always count on Gucci to entertain and amuse, even when they are not trying to. This bag, aptly named the "Babouska" (what chance does the bag have with such a heinous name? Which makes me wonder,,, "Would a rose smell as sweet if given another name?") is an ode to the frightful fringe trend that has taken over Fall 2008 bags. This one is particularly strange because the fringe is only in two strips like long beards via ZZ Top (if you don't know who that is, consider yourself lucky). Throw on a nose ring and multiple earrings, and the transformation is complete. I may be wrong here but I think you can come up with better things to waste your two grand on. $1,995 at Saks.comWhat do you guys think? Snob or Slob?