Recently in On The Rag Category

I hope these pearls on Valentino's Woven Satchel are real because this bag is an outrageous € 3198.00/$4,318! There are a lot of gorgeous bags to be had out there at this price point, but this is not one of them. It's not that horrible of a bag but it's just not good enough to garner that kind of price tag. I don't mind its backside with the simple and beautifully woven leather and can even overlook the many rows of fringes resembling my hula skirt if the price was, say, $500. The shape is actually nice and it'd be a great daily bag without all the unnecessary bells and whistles.

Look, I really appreciate the workmanship it took to achieve the tightly woven leather and to hand sew the pearls but really, a simple woven tote would have worked just fine. It would have been very hippie luxe with a pair of bell bottom jeans and soft gauzy top but someone got a bit ambitious and over embellished. VALENTINO - WOVEN FRINGE PEARL SATCHEL at Luisa via Roma

What do you guys think? Snob or Slob?

As we leave 2008, there are a few bags we would like to leave behind with it.  Let's forget them forever but before we do so, let's just have a gander one last time for kicks.  If you own one of these, don't feel bad, it could just mean that you are on the super cutting edge of fashion but one thing is for sure, you will not be revisiting these bags in 2009 and there is no closet deep enough to hide them!!!  As with everything else I do, the numbering is arbitrary but is loosely based on the travesty to its label as well as how much they scare me.

10. The Jimmy Choo Face Canvas was defended by many, at least by as many as there are faces on the bag, but I guess if your face is immortalized on anything with a designer label on it, you could forgive but for the rest of us, we should not. I have nothing against the models depicted here but faces and bags just do not go hand in hand. And the humongousness along with the fact that it is super glossy, as you can imagine just makes it all that more gross.

9. If you want to use the Burberry Warrior as a self defense weapon on late nights out, then by all means, but if you think this is in any way fashionable then you need to arm yourself with a few self help fashion tip guides and subscriptions to magazines that aren't written by fan boys (it's ok if you need to look up that term, it is probably good for your fashion sense that you aren't such a Star Wars fan).

Just for kicks on the last Monday of the year (as much as I am looking forward to the new year, I am always sad to end a chapter in my life) I'd thought we'd poke fun at this ridiculous golden apple bag from Temperley. Now I do own several Temperley dresses and think they're just heavenly but this kitshy little bag is just too annoying to ignore. I'm sure some of you will protest and say this is adorable and you'll wear it with a little black dress, etc etc. But I go nuts when I see bags made to look like anything I'd want to eat. The apple has been blamed for everything from tempting Eve to poisoning Snow White and I'm sure Temperley has deep symbolic meaning behind this bag but I'll be passing on this temptation. If you're into this kinda thing, it's £495.00 ($728.69) at Brown's Fashion.

What do you think? Snob or Slob?

Let me put this delicately, even if this was the last bag on earth and free, I wouldn't carry it. I can't imagine what went through MJ's mind when he designed/approved of this awful thing (well, I can imagine but I'm not going to say it). I tried to make the photos as small as possible as to not frighten you with a nightmare before Christmas but it was necessary to show all the gruesome details of this ghastly bag. To make matters worse, it appears the entire cast of Escape to Madagascar were used for the bag (I adore that movie-- I like to move it move it!). The poor animals-- had they known this would happen they would have stayed in the NYC Zoo! I can't even tell how you're supposed to open the bag, or perhaps the bag is merely decorative!?!?! Will have to request sample to investigate further but we are not the most popular people at Marc Jacobs. Such a shame because I'd love to sit with him and just watch him at work. Then I can explain the madness genius to you all. MARC JACOBS - LAYERED SAHARA TOP HANDLE 1,749.00 EUR/2,438.33 USD at Luisa Via Roma.

Enough of what I think, what say you my lovelies? Snob or Slob?

You'd think having almost the entire stock of its lace bags from Fall '08 in the 75% off clearance bin would make Prada think twice before producing more disasters but apparently that is not a deterrent. The Cervo Bowler bag is in pink pebbled calf leather (sounds reasonable) but it's covered in Black or Black/White lace print (does not sound reasonable). And how will you clean this darn thing (you can't, you'll have to throw it away)? I thought designers were scaling back but apparently not, this sucker is $2,350. That said, I love that Miuccia doesn't care if the world thinks this is hideous, she likes it and that's what matters. At Neiman Marcus. This makes me very sad, by the way. Because Prada fueled my bag obsession in college but I can't remember the last Prada bag I purchased. What about you? When did you last purchase a Prada bag?

I have been a serious fan of 3.1 Phillip Lim and to see this phenomenal gaffe of a bag is terribly disappointing. It looks like a folded over comforter hanging on the edge of your bed's footboard. Those flaps are so disproportionately huge and they are on both sides! They do open up and function as pockets but I'm thinking if you overstuff them, the already exaggerated volume of them will just become ridiculous. Even the layering of the fold and the blue trim on the bottom looks like a mistake, it's odd and mismatched. This design is nonsensical and totally hideous. The leather is soft and the colors are great but who really cares at this point? The 3.1 Phillip Lim Meira Bag at eluxury for a waste of $725.

We were asked to clean up our language so I will try my damndest best to do so on this very unattractive and ridiculously expensive bag.

Oh Bulga, 'tis been almost a year since I ragged on thee but it seems things over yonder have not changed much. How one can continue to churn out bags such as this and still stay in business is beyond me. Before I continue I want to point out that this bag is not leather (okay, so the band across the top and the handles are leather scraps) it is merely tie dyed DENIM. As in COTTON. As in the stuff that costs 95 cents a pound.  Get my drift?  Okay, so now I'll tell you the price, no no no, it's not the $15 that it looks to be worth.  It is $595.  Go ahead and take some time to gasp before I continue.

Done?  So let's explore all the things you can buy for $595...  well it'd take all day and frankly, I have an appointment and can not spend any more time on this.  I'm sure you can figure out how to spend this money on your own.  On another note, I am certain I am hated over at Bulga headquarters and I just want to state for the record that I am really looking forward to the day that I can rave and gush about a Bulga bag.

Bulga Essex Tote at Shopbop.com

I just found one of my old Loewe bags from 15 years ago in my mom's closet, I was so excited to be reunited with this adorable little red bag, until I opened it up to find the mess that the lining has become. I have no idea what happened to it but the two sides stuck together and when I pulled it apart the entire lining became cracked and is now peeling off all over my hands. I am pretty sure it is some sort of synthetic material, although when I spoke to Loewe they insisted that it is leather. I have never seen leather do this before, it is not patent leather that would stick. I was told I can take it back to have it replaced which I am happy about but am still distraught that this would happen. The outside is still buttery soft and the leather is in perfect condition and just as lovable as it was 15 years ago but I can't get over how poor their lining quality is. Why would you end the superior craftsmanship at the zipper? Based on my conversation with them, I am sure this problem has been corrected for their current bags. But if you have this problem, at least they stand by their product and will fix it for you.

I am on a family trip to Taiwan and thought it would be fun and interesting to throw in a few gems that I find here. I could do the basic Gucci, LV and Chanel which are everly so popular here but how boring would that be? People here line up out the door to the Gucci boutique just to buy the GG canvas bags by the balefuls! Maybe if they start rioting I could get a story =) I was at the new Sogo yesterday, it is the big department store that has boutiques for Hermes, Chanel, Balenciaga, Marni, Mulberry, etc. but none of those caught my eye like this one did. Among all the international designers was this local line, I am embarrassed to say I don't read Chinese so I can't tell you what the brand is, but it is spectacularly wrong. I think it is a pirate skull with a tiara, but look at the earrings - knife and fork?? I am reserving my judgment, I will let you decide what you think of this very interesting bag. The price tag at least is bearable, around $200 USD. But then, you would have to own this bag and what would you do with it?

What is going on here!?!? Everything is on sale and I'm sick of looking at old stuff but the new stuff scare me so I don't want to look at them, either. It's enough to make me want to crawl in my bag closet to cuddle my birkins (yes, I have one being built!) and not come out until the dry spell is over! Look at this monstrous Marni bag. Who is it for.. Jabba the Hut? A diaper for a giant? What's with the itsy bitsy tiny handles? I have small hands so I'll at least be able to put two fingers through it but then I'll have to pray my fingers don't break because a 38cmx38cm bag full of stuff probably weighs as much as I do. Or maybe I should put a broomstick through it and carry it across my back like a field worker? I may have Turkey and champagne induced delirium but I'm not so drunk that I can't see this for what it is. A piece of crap, literally. Marni Triangle slouchy hobo $1,795 at Net-a-porter.com