Recently in On The Rag Category

I'm back from a long vacation of fun in the sun in Malibu-- I almost forgot how to log into the software to blog!  I've really missed working and was eager to look around for great bags to report to you but apparently I have not missed much in the bag world.  The first two bags I came upon were these sorry looking saggy messes.  If they are not the most pathetic and hideous bags of the season I don't know what is.  And here I thought sea monsters were in the ocean!!!  Cleobella Alive Fringe Tote ($528 at Shopbop) is made of sickly looking leather tags that make my skin crawl.  Amongst other things, it is over priced by $500.  Donna Karan Eldridge Convertible Tote ($1,495 at Saks) is only slightly better but way more expensive-- the pleated details only further the draggy saggy look.  We keep saying this and will probably never be invited to a Donna Kara show but she needs to stop making bags!  Such a disappointment to get back to work to find this.  Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. 

I can see now why everyone returned this bag. As promised, shopbop.com got the denim leather in. You can see in this lighter color how gross the leather is. And why the heck was it done in this acid washed denim color? Ewwww. And the silver studs washes out the edgy vibe, making it look even cheaper. Well, yes, this is well priced but at $850, it certainly isn't "cheap". I say, all the people who have the black, take it back to revolt against this one or just to cut all associations to this version. Yuck.

I have been loving Celine lately so you'd think if they come out with any exotic, I would go ga-ga and be all over it. Yeah, you would think, unless it looks like a forest monster. Or the mouth of a whale. Those fringes on both sides look like baleen. What exactly is hiding behind it? The hobo has a great classic shape and of course the gray python is exquisite but to ruin it with the messy hairy fringes is a travesty. Look at the back of the back with the cool straps, that would have been great controlled detail. The gunmetal hardware and the onyx jewel clasp (I don't think it's real onyx) are all so incredible and would have been enough! At some point, you gotta just stop yourself, step back and be like, ok this bag is done, stop throwing more crap on it. And the price, hello, $4200!! But what am I talking about, this bag is sold out at Net-a-Porter!! The only amazing thing about it.

These canvas tote bags have printed pictures of the Hermes Kelly and the Chanel classic flap. OMG, can we all say, BLASPHEMY!??!! Is this even legal? I'm sure lawyers will be making some phone calls very soon. Remember those jelly birkins? Those got taken down in a hurry (but not before my sister bought one, at least those were kitschy and humorous). These however are just hideous and ridiculous. The only good use I can see for these are to store your actual Hermes and Chanel in so you can identify them in your closet. No self respecting lover of fashion should be caught dead anywhere near these. Oh, there is another one, so revolting I couldn't put up, it is an LV with the multi-color Murakami design. Ugghhh. I can believe Browns Fashion even has these. Hermes Kelly print and Chanel print for $65.

I loved this bag from afar and ran towards it like a moth to flame, something about the distressed calfskin and sprinkling of small studs really spoke to me and I grabbed it excitedly.  That's when I saw that it's not perfect, far from it.  First, there is a row of silver studs next to the gold on each side.  For no apparent reason as there is not a speck of silver anywhere else on the bag.  It'd make more sense to carry the dual tone silver/gold throughout the bag, on the handles, etc.  The way they did it makes it look like an afterthought.  And that giant clasp on the zipper pull threw me off when I turned the bag around.  Sigh, is it too much to just ask for a subtle studded bag with a tasteful zipper pull?  Another feature that irked me is the side handles for the convertible shoulder strap, sticking out like mini Dumbo ears.  I feel bad that I am hating on Prada lately but they are making it difficult for me to love on anything! 

Gimmicky? Yes. Kind of cool? Kind of. If it wasn't for the Margiela name behind it, it wouldn't even be worth the mention. But there is something intriguing about such an expensive and well made bag that tries this hard just to draw a raised eyebrow and maybe a chuckle. You really have to run out of all options before you even consider a bag like this. I feel it is important to incorporate sense of humor in all aspects of your life, but it should end at thousand dollar bags. It should probably end at $20 bags, as in, a reusable grocery bag with a funny picture. I keep trying to imagine what my reaction would be if I saw one of my girlfriends with this bag. And in total honesty, albeit bitchy, I think I would lose all respect for her taste and never consider style advise from her ever again. Is that harsh? I just hope I don't run into anyone with this bag anytime soon =) At Saks Fifth Avenue for $1145.

What do you think?

I read in the paper that owls eat dogs, a little boy actually witnessed an owl swoop down on his pup and take off with it in its paws! How traumatic do you think that was!?!? I have had a fear of them ever since, they are such sinister looking little suckers aren't they? Even disguised as a little beaded bag, I am scared. You know, I have never got the whole Judith Leiber kitschy beaded minaudieres craze (but ask me when I'm 50, I might change my mind). First, they are expensive beyond and yes, I do realize it's very labor intensive and the swarovski crystals are expensive but come on! $4,050!? Second, it's such an awkward piece to hold in the hand. Perhaps I'm missing something here, please enlighten me if you are a fan. As for this owl-- STOP staring at me. You, yes, you-- the hooter! Stop it! Judith Leiber Owl $4,050 at Net-a-Porter.com

I was really rooting for Hannah MacGibbon to rock Chloe's world back to Pheobe Philo's glory days but what I'm seeing lately is making me cringe! What is this thing?  Suede, studs and way too many chains going on.  It looks like macrame craft project gone bad. 

Delivery for this bag is not until September, so perhaps there is time to salvage this.  Let's start with removing the studs (and this is from a stud addict)-- it makes no sense whatsoever to have the two rows of studs there alongside all of that chain detail unless it's removable and converts to a belt in which case it makes perfect sense (not).  The chains framing the studs need to go, too.  That leaves the actual chain that holds up the bag and the chain down the center.  Now you have a chic bag with chains.  But I have no idea when suede and chains became so expensive, the bag is 2,662 euro/$3,685USD!  What do you think?  Snob or slob?

CHLOE for women from LUISAVIAROMA

I would like to start out by apologizing for even putting up pictures of these bags on Bag Snob. These Cell Phone bags are for the ultimate phone addict. There is a pocket with a clear touch pad friendly plastic window so that you can see messages and perform simple functions. I'm sorry, if you are this addicted to your phone, you should just not leave the house. And if you care so little about your bags, you might as well just put all your things in a zip lock bag. Even my husband thinks this is lame even though he is surgically attached to his iphone. He raised a good point, how do you hold the bag while you're using the phone? You have to cradle it in your arms, not exactly convenient if the price you're paying for that convenience is looking like a fool. They are $250 for the tote and $100 for the clutch, take a look if you want a good laugh.